Through Darkest Zymurgia!

A Ripping Yarn by William H. Duquette

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An Expedition to Zymurgia

by Leon Thintwhistle III, DMg.

Being a narrative of the expedition undertaken in the year 680 by Dr. Thintwhistle and his colleagues Thomas Carbuncle and Dr. Thaddeus Philpott, all of Glastonbury University, of their explorations in the remote land of Zymurgia, and of the divers incidents which occurred on the journey there and back again.


Table of Contents

Author's Preface

Chapter 1

The expedition is planned. • Dr. Philpott joins us. • A change of plans. • We set sail from Pelham Pond.

Chapter 2

The Sea-Spaniel. • Philpott's sincerity. • Equipment and supplies. • Life at sea.

Chapter 3

Lunch at La Mortadella • A day in Lyricum Town. • We recruit a new member.

Chapter 4

A night at the Opera.

Chapter 5

Glissandos in the dark. • A morning in jail.

Chapter 6

A missed communique. • Bruno settles in. • Shipboard routine. • A flight of dolphins.

Chapter 7

An unexpected delay. • A fish-dinner in Cuprios.

Chapter 8

Life on Cuprios. • Philpott investigates the natives. • A day in the country. • A celebration. • The hazards of chilling wine.

Chapter 9

Another communique. • A distressing discovery. • The fruits of Philpott's investigations. • We continue our journey.

Chapter 10

The city of Phillipi. • The many mouths of the Aram. • The mystery of Seros.

Chapter 11

The Lake of Saco. • We make camp. • An old friend. • Plans and preparations.

Chapter 12

A council of war

Chapter 13

Preliminary surveys. • An unwelcome visitor.

Chapter 14

Carbuncle goes fishing. • A conversation with Mr. Fox. • The trader approaches.

Chapter 15

The trader arrives.

Chapter 16

A Serosan feast. • The trading proceeds • We refrain from damaging Dr. Philpott.

Chapter 17

The results of Dr. Philpott's research • We prepare for departure.

Chapter 18

A view from a height. • The exploration party. • We ascend the cliff.

Chapter 19

The village of Tomar and its environs • A jolly cook • Bruno and the dogs of Tomar

Chapter 20

The non-universality of social mores • Bruno and the Masters of Tomar • We petition the Masters

Chapter 21

The pups of Basenis • The vital importance of sophistication in theology • The conundrum of Frederick Fox

Chapter 22

Still no beer • A Zymurgian festival • An auction • Philpott's unconsidered opinion

Chapter 23

We are not torn to pieces • A dog fight • The Masters compromise

Chapter 24

A day's surveying • Nutcakes and napkins • Carbuncle is perplexed

Chapter 25

A little gossip • A promenade • "Aybahsmaht!"

Chapter 26

The expedition proceeds • Giggles and gooney balls • Dinner with Roshnoy the grain balancer

Chapter 27

Philpott's abstraction • An interview with Mistress Simuny • The love of Philpott's life

Chapter 28

The story of Hillip and Asha • Nabili's secret • Carbuncle's great discovery

Chapter 29

We are not torn to pieces, again

Chapter 30

The wrath of Basenis • Basenis and the Aybahsmaht

Chapter 31

Politics and practicality

Chapter 32

Forward to Basenis Basor • Asha and Philpott • An unexpected guest

Chapter 33

A few hands of whist • Toad in the hole • A matter of taste

Chapter 34

The danger of jumping to conclusions • Trees of mystery • The bottle of Waterloughs'

Chapter 35

Confrontations in Bandeku • Ascending the tiger

Chapter 36

The Holy City • The muster of Zymurgia • Camping on the outskirts

Chapter 37

Rumors of battle • The wizard's demands • The architecture of Basenis Basor

Chapter 38

The wrath of Basenis • Nabili's fate • The fruits of research

Chapter 39

The council grows impatient • Muzzling an idol • Of warrants and wine-chillers

Chapter 40

Frederick makes us a proposition • "Gooneybah!" • We leave the Land Above. • A writ-server in Lyricum

Chapter 41

A spring afternoon in Glastonbury

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Copyright © 2003 by William H. Duquette